On Heart-Based Relations – an esoteric deep dive

What exactly, makes a relationship Heart-Based??

If an everyday intimate relationship is when we have someone to make house with, have sex and intimacy with, an activity partner, and someone for recreation and holidays – What then does one do differently with a love partner in a Heart-Based Relationship?

What about in a platonic relationship, like a parent-child connection? Aside from caregiving from the parent to the child, teaching the needed lessons in life, appropriate affection, and if one is lucky, creative and/or recreational pursuits together – What then does one do differently with a familial partner in a Heart-Based Relationship?
Or how about close friends?

In what fundamental ways are Heart-Based Relations different to regular caring relations?
What is a Heart-Based Relationship – really?

A Relationship is Relating Individuals

Perhaps we need to look much more closely at what makes a singular person Heart-Based before we can possibly consider a relationship governed by Heart-Based Principles. Then to follow this with how it works when both partners are themselves living as Heart-Based Beings.

When we consider that many do not realise Love is Not an emotion; and warm emotional feelings, no matter how lovely, are not based in nor emanate from the Heart, but are actually expressions of the Solar Plexus Centre (the base of power and place of emanation of the emotions), we can see how confusing it is to differentiate between a Love-Based person and an Emotion-Centred one.

What does it really mean when we say a person is Heart-Based?

Esoterically, this means the person has lifted their consciousness out of the chakras beneath the diaphragm, the lower non-sacred centres, and therefore left behind identification with their lower mind, emotions, and form, as Self; and now has their consciousness anchored in their Heart, and several of the higher sacred centres.
It means the authentic qualities of the Heart, are the primary ones driving their values and livingness. As opposed to the demands of their body, their emotions, and their lower mind. Yes, we are talking about a level of Enlightenment.

So indeed, truly Heart-Based people are not at all common, even though humans are generally capable of accessing and expressing Heart qualities in moments throughout their life. The vast majority are based in, and therefore predominantly driven by, their emotions, mental emotions, and lower concrete minds.

What does it take to be Heart-Based?

Let us unpack this deeper, to further reveal the rarity of a truly Heart-Based person, so this goal can stand clear before us…

If there is any Glamour or Illusion present in a person, remembering glamour is a colouring quality of the emotions, and illusion a distortion of Truth – this reveals their consciousness is not based in their Heart. So, even if they have the appearance of expressing selflessness for example, a most beautiful quality of the Heart, the glamour and illusion reveals they are still controlled by their emotions and lower mind. These patterns within them will colour and distort their selflessness – so their Heart expression is only a temporary state, and not evidence that their consciousness is fully based in, nor anchored above the diaphragm! It means they are open to their Heart to a degree, but most certainly not based there yet.

We all have Heart Centres, and so, in theory, we all have access to Love in its purest form. The difference lies in a person’s ability to access it, and the degree to which it is distorted by the energies emanating from their lower centres – which says nothing of the needed purification and transmutation of the non-sacred petals of the Heart Centre itself! But that’s a whole other story…

So, drawing all of this together, a truly Heart-Based Person is one who has freed themselves from identification with, and therefore control by, the energies of their lower centres – their body, desires, and lower mind; and has achieved therefore, the raising of the seat of their consciousness into their Heart! Thereby allowing a full and unimpeded expression of the qualities of the Heart.

This they have done by:

  • Seeing the body in the truth of what it is, a transient vehicle of incarnation, and nothing more. Certainly not who they are. Thereby not being controlled by their body.
  • Transmuting all emotions and glamour through the fires of their Heart Centre, releasing a deeper layer of identification. Thereby not being controlled by their emotions.
  • Destroying all illusions of mind with the clear light of straight knowledge. Bringing illumination, and access to the abstract mind. Thereby not being controlled by the lower mind.

All of this then, empowering and making way for the Clear Cold Reason and Dispassion of the Heart!

In short, to be truly and fully Heart-Based, one must achieve their 3rd Initiation – that is, integration and then mastery of their whole Personality, followed by Soul Fusion.

So, as this achievement takes lifetimes to arrive at, let us instead explore what is available to us in moments of Heart-Centred Awareness! And what the Path to the Heart looks like for individuals at differing levels of Awakening and Mastery.

It’s all about “capacity”

We should ask: “How is Heart-Centred Awareness different for Average Humanity, Aspirants, Disciples and Initiates?” I ask this, as one’s alignment to or embodiment of Love, would surely be measured against the capacities and awareness available to them at their level of evolution and awakening.

Therefore, just as it would be unfair and unloving to expect a young child to behave like a university professor, it is just as unfair and unloving to expect Average Humanity to behave like an Initiate or Master!
One should always look with eyes of compassion and nonjudgement at all members of the human family, and especially those of differing levels of evolution within humanity – understanding that we all do the best we can with what we have within us.

Which means that until someone learns greater principles and higher values than what they currently hold, they do not have the possibility to live and act from those values. Which further means they can only be as loving as they can be, until they learn otherwise!

It is always the job of those that see with greater vision, to lead those who do not see thusly. To parent the young, if I may use such a clumsy expression. This too is not about being better or more than anyone else – Every Link in the chain is equally important! But it is about capacity, and each of us offering the best of the capacities and awareness we have available within us – this is true for all of humanity!

Most certainly, those with greater, or clearer, or higher awareness, have a responsibility to guide and lead those with lesser awareness, to guide in ways more Heart-Based – for how else will the Earth and Humanity evolve? Do we not all “look up to” those we ourselves identify as greater than us?

So, looking at Disciples and Initiates…
If their life is about Serving the Plan with all of their being – what then of their relationships?
Surely, these too are something that helps them serve their Higher Self and the guides of humanity, thereby helping to bring The Divine Plan into manifestation?
Or are their relationships something that takes from this – their time, their energy, their focus, and therefore, their consciousness? Hmmm

Tools for Transformation

Is Your Relationship Heart-Based?
Some questions to help reveal how you are, in relationship:

Q: Are you just going into Holiday Mode whenever you spend time with your partner, basically using your relationship as an excuse to become an indulgent consumer?

Q: Of the combined resources of which you are custodians and directors, how are you investing or spending them – your energy, time, and money? How are these resources being spent, to make better the world?

Q: What is the “child” your relationship is creating? What is the product of your relationship?

Now Continuing Deeper…

Sacrifice and the Heart

To follow the Heart is to sacrifice – to give, that others may grow.
To sacrifice the desires of the Personality, for this experience or that thing, to see this or do that – to instead live in service to others.
To give your All to The Divine Plan, means your All, not just a few bits that you pick and choose.
And of course, in time, to sacrifice your entire Personality as well.

But why is sacrifice linked to the Heart?
The Heart is Group Conscious. The Heart is Connected to All. The Heart knows that One cannot have True Peace until All Life shares in that Peace!

On the day-to-day level, “the rich must live more simply, so the poor may simply live,” as Gandhi put it.

This choice to live more simply is but one aspect of sacrifice. We surrender a certain level of First World comfort and convenience – so that we are not taking from the earth and society more than our fair and needed share. For we know that First World standards are not globally sustainable. To continue to live this way is, therefore, obviously not of the Heart! Surely this is also true of our Western obsession with experiences and things – do we genuinely need so much stimulation?

On a deeper level, one has to surrender a certain amount of individuality, to instead embrace commonality and oneness. For true awakening (and Initiation) is only possible through being truly Group Conscious – this is another aspect of sacrifice – and this is ever aligned to the Transmutation of me/mine to us/ours.
One’s unique strengths, ideas, and creativity are all still of great value, but must be utilised for the greater/collective good, rather than personally and for the individual alone.

When we see that We Are All One, when we truly get that we live within the one biosphere (the Earth), and everything we do flows on and affects everyone and everything else around us – we could no more cause harm to another being as we could to our own foot. To live in This Way is to sacrifice what we have learnt and how we have been programmed about how modern life should be lived – to instead embrace a gentler, quieter, kinder life.

The Heart is Aligned to Evolution

It is wise, is it not, to live in alignment with the energies of Evolution – that is to say the spiral-cyclic-motion of the Heart – that which drives Evolution.

The Evolutionary Arc itself is flavoured by each Great Age, counted through the turning of the Great Zodiacal Wheel. Each Age having therefore its own particular qualifying energies and lasting approximately 2500 years.

We are moving currently out of the Age of Pisces, and the Age of Aquarius is more and more upon us.
One could say that the end period of the Piscean Age has been the Age of the Individual – the age of rampant mind, or mental emotions; and it is this individualism and this mentality we must sacrifice in the Fires of the Heart, for one of the key aspects of Aquarius is Group Consciousness – Universality. So, this time period is directly aligned therefore to the Way of the Heart – Now is the time to make our cultures and our world more Loving – more Heart-Based!

To achieve this, we must be prepared to sacrifice our out-of-balance individual desires and ways, to draw together, to find what is globally sustainable, and to strive to live in This Way! One people – One world.

These sacrifices should become easier and easier as our Hearts awaken more and more. Though in the end, all true sacrifice is actually painless – as before the final act we have already changed our mental and emotional relationship to whatever it is. So, the final action of release, is one of ease and lightening.

However, beyond sacrifice, in a truly Heartful Being, there is No self to want this or that thing or experience, no sacrifice therefore required. At this stage of evolutionary advancement, there is just Service.

So, if indeed a Heartful Being you are, it is the collective wellbeing you are serving.
Would this Self, this You, really invest time, money, energy into things or experiences that do not further that work – things that take from it?
Ponder on this…

Communication within a Relationship

I find it perplexing when I hear, as often I have through my life; that some people are less likely to listen to, or take on board, ideas, thoughts, and observations, offered to them from their partner – because they are in a relationship together! Oh my goodness!

Should this not be the other way around?!
For are we not in a relationship with someone because we love and value them? Because we value who they are, what they bring to our lives, and what we can create together – with them, over and above all others? This person with whom we choose to share the deepest of intimacy, beyond everyone else.
Are we not intending to offer them all of ourselves – Body, Mind, Heart, and Soul?
And open to receiving all of them – Body, Mind, Heart, and Soul?

Why then, within this deep level of open sharing, revealing, and seeing of each other, would we dismiss the observations and words of support from this one most close to us – preferencing instead, what? From whom? Meme Wisdom? Concepts from a book that may or may not genuinely relate to us?

Surely a partner can see us more fully and deeply than any other – we do often say (when we are in relationship with somebody) “we are seeing someone” – so why not open to their seeing of us? For surely, they only ever seek to support us to grow into our Best Self and speak to us therefore from this Love.

So why sabotage one of the best reasons for being in relationship?
Why close the door to seeing and being seen, and sharing this between you?
Open to each other and what you have to offer. If you do not trust and value what your partner offers and gives you – perhaps you should really question, why you are in relationship at all!

Of course, I should add at this juncture, while the level of intimacy we share in a Heart-Based Relationship can allow deep seeing of each other – we must co-measure these insights against the fact that our level of closeness also has the chance to erode our true Objectivity! So, when we share our insights, we should choose a non-authoritarian, non-judging, and non-blaming manner and language.

Love is Expansively Radiant

When two Heart-Based People come together, or two people striving to be Heart-Based, we are talking about the awakening, purifying, and merging of their Heart Fires. That is to say – we are speaking of people striving to connect to, embody and act from Divine Love.

Divine Love is like the Sun – it shines indiscriminately upon all. It gives selflessly of itself. Its own process of inner transmutation fuels it’s giving – and so it is with Awakened Heart-Based Folk.

  • The relationship is never about what it can get – it is about what it can give!
  • It is about helping each other to rise even higher in vibrational living – through supporting each another to transmute your limitations, but not support each other to indulge in them.
  • It is about calling in and embodying that magical extra something that makes the whole greater than the sum of its parts.
  • Esoterically, a Heart-Based Relationship is about having greater potential for Self-Mastery and Awakening through Benevolent Service – thus lifting others, as the partners raise themselves.
  • It is about Shared Purpose and the opportunity to open to the Collective Consciousness of the Heart.

In the final analysis, I am not here to try and sell you The Path of the Heart.
I am not here to make the path appealing – so you will desire it over all other desirous things – No!

I am here to tell you that when your Heart is in charge, when you are therefore ready, there is simply No Other Way you will want to live or be!
And not because there is no value in any thing or experience available to us, but because the You that might desire such things will have long since been consumed in the Fires of the Heart!

Love Love
Azure Seer

Summary Bullets

  • A Heart-Based Relationship is different to a regular one.
  • To be Heart-Based, means having one’s consciousness Based in their Heart, anchored above the diaphragm.
  • If glamour or illusion are present at all, then the person has not completely raised their consciousness to be seated in their Heart.
  • Any person may be able to access moments of Heart Qualities throughout their life, even if they cannot sustain them or live therein. Though these Heart Qualities would still be modified, diluted, and distorted by the presence of the person’s glamour and illusion.
  • The Heart is the repository and place of emanation of Clear Cold Reason, Dispassion, and Wisdom!
  • To be truly and fully Heart-Based, one must achieve their 3rd Initiation.
    That is, integration and then mastery of their whole Personality, followed by Soul Fusion!
    This is the only way to ensure Love is not distorted or aberrated by the energies of the Lower Self and Lower Centres.
  • The Heart is fully Group Conscious, as it is a reflection of the Soul, which is at-oned with all other Souls, in the Kingdom of Souls.
  • The 3rd Initiation takes lifetimes to achieve and is quite rare within humanity at this stage.
  • Heart-Based therefore means one is preoccupied with the welfare and well-being of all others, all life – over and above their own, but not at their own demise. It means they are truly self-less, i.e. not operating as a separate singular being.
  • We should look at The Path or journey to becoming Heart-Based. Focusing on the moments of Heart Alignment and how to make them of longer duration and more frequent for a person.
  • A Heart-Based Relationship can be seen and measured: by the increasing Greatness, Love, and True Beauty it awakens in the partners, in the product (or child) of their relationship, and in their impact in the world at large.
  • All of the above reveals that one’s alignment to, or embodiment of Love, must surely be measured against the capacities and awareness available to them – at their level of evolution and awakening.
  • It would be unloving to expect a member of Average Humanity, or even a Disciple, to behave like a Master of Wisdom! So, we must embody compassion, nonjudgement, and understanding when considering how Heart-Based someone or something truly is.
  • It is always the job of those with greater vision to lead and guide those who do not yet see as they do – to parent the young – for how else will we all evolve?
  • Disciples and Initiates lives are dedicated to Service of The Divine Plan – to live for The Plan is to live for the Heart!

Further Reading

For a deep explanation of the Nature of the Heart, Clear Cold Reason, and the first 3 Initiations, see my Article: On Love, Emotions, and Initiation

For more on the topic of Heart-Based Relations, see my Article: On the Heart, Love, and Relationships

And for a dive into the Nature and Mastery of Spiritual Glamour, see my Article: The Challenge of Spiritual Glamour

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